February 23, 2010
Several Fantastic Professional Coaching Pointers For Staying Married
Parents can find it very hard to understand all the changes that they have gone through. The arrival of kids can make a huge difference and really change the way that they looked at the relationship and at the very structure of the partnership.
Some of these momentous changes can make a big difference to a happy marriage. Delicate adjustments are needed by both people here as they try and right the boat and this can apply whether you have had kids before, or not. A relationship will take a lot of maintenance to ensure that when children arrive, everything remains well grounded.
Have a look at everything from a big perspective, especially if you begin to doubt what is happening, start to worry or even become mad. You've heard the phrase, "can't see the wood for the trees"? This is particularly apt when applied to two frazzled parents who have to just keep going! Sometimes this leads to the need for additional jobs and causes parents to become complex role players. In a situation such as this, even more pressure can arise as each person tries to concentrate on their new role, to the detriment of the other relationships. To take new parents as an example again, "mum" may become somewhat obsessed with the idea of caring for her newborn and the marriage itself may not have as much of a priority.
When mum is so absorbed with the new arrival, dad can feel as if he is completely surplus. In this situation, you might start to believe the mum is the one to look after the kids and step back. The danger here is that he may distance himself from the partnership, assuming that he's doing the right thing.
Both parties need to watch each other and look for tell-tale signs. Some of the symptoms include a quick temper, a feeling that one cannot cope and becoming irritable. The worst thing one can do is to leave any potential problems unchecked as they can quickly become unmanageable and dangerous.
Whenever the kids are not around, sit down and have a very deep and meaningful conversation. Ask yourself whether you are being reasonable and ask the other for their honest input. Remember that it is very difficult to maintain the kind of lifestyle you may have enjoyed before the children came along and understand that you now have a different set of priorities in your life.
The most important point to remember is that it will take the efforts of the team to raise the children properly and both members need to realise how much effort this will take and how it is a joint venture. When all is said and done, give each other a hug and remember that you are the leaders of the pack!
Don't think for a moment that this all has to be about doom and gloom! You do need to prioritise time together, but just make sure that your time represents quality time. Ask yourself when you last spent a weekend away together or did something fun with each other. Plan a really nice, romantic dinner and don't forget those meaningful, romance filled surprises, from back in the day.
Experts can often help mums with their huge challenge ahead, especially those who are still working when all this madness is going on. Thankfully, online life coaching is a marvellous way to pick up some truly professional coaching, and when it comes to coaching for women, it's the perfect place to turn when life becomes manic!
Amanda Alexander is the Director of Coaching Mums and a widely renowned ICF-accredited coach who delivers professional coaching programmes to working moms across the globe who long for more time, balance and fulfilment in their busy lives. Download our free eBook especially for working mums with 5 easy ways to achieve balance.
Filed under How To Hypnotize by blogdom
February 13, 2010
Useful Ideas For Returning To Work During A Recession
It is not the smartest idea to take a career break in the middle of a recession if you can help it, but sometimes we are forced to do this and certainly must if we are expecting a new arrival. Household budgets are difficult to balance at the best of times and the thought of being a full-time mum can be attractive, but hardly realistic. Whenever we're ready to get back into the job market we need to look for ways to catch up economically.
With unemployment rates so high, the labour market can seem to be an even more daunting proposition than usual. This is not the time to be recalcitrant however, as you need to double your preparation and negotiation skills along with your self-confidence. To start off with, you should make a thorough analysis of your financial position and needs for the months and years ahead. While you must always be reasonable, cut out anything that you don't really need. You should be very clear about your financial requirements, the absolute minimums and the ideal scenarios.
While you may have been quite happy with your career prior to the break, this is an opportunity for you to really evaluate whether you want to go back into that line of business, or whether you want to explore something new. Is this the time to consider setting up your own business, for example? Does your financial analysis tell you that you can expect to have fair returns from self-employment, while still making ends meet and if so you may be presented with an exciting and flexible concept for your new life. You are being faced with some significant and potentially very far-reaching decisions and you might want to consider professional coaching at this time. Thankfully, coaching for women in your situation can definitely help you to determine what to do.
Always be very positive and never negative. Focus on all your strengths, which you should write out on paper and keep on your desk at all times. Reinforce your psyche and project yourself in all your conversations, phone calls and e-mails.
When looking at a particular position, always consider jobs that may be beneath, but would naturally form part of a career progression in this field. You may be overqualified, but if it gives you a stepping-stone toward your ideal position, by going the extra mile you will soon find that you become eligible (and get) the position that you want.
Even in this tough hiring environment, those people who really stand out, help and over-perform will still get ahead of the unfortunate majority who do not. Set your mindset for success and you will get there.
At this stage, you will need all of the inner strength that you can muster. It is easy to get disenchanted by the negative news we hear about the economy and jobs every day and while you might begin to think that the task is very difficult, don't think that it is a hill too steep. However, remember to take this journey one step at a time and always be 100% sure about your ability and chances of getting a position before you pick up that phone or type that e-mail. A useful tip — take a deep breath and even stand up when you make a phone call. If you have a drooping mindset or a sagging posture this will not help you. Always smile as you talk on the phone as well.
Nowadays, online life coaching can give you the boost when you need it, as all of us go through periods of negativity or self-doubt. You can do it!
Amanda Alexander is Director of Coaching Mums and a highly acclaimed ICF-accredited coach who delivers professional coaching programmes to working mums who yearn for success, balance and fulfilment. Are you a juggling mom? Download our free eBook for working moms that will give you 5 simple and instant ways to balance your life right now!
Filed under How To Hypnotize by blogdom
February 2, 2010
Five Crucial Suggestions For Managing Work And Family Simultaneously
The old saying tells us that the best laid plans of mice and men will fail. While a mouse might not really lead a complicated life, it nevertheless seems impossible for us to plan our busy lives around our family and work without some of those unexpected “days off” attributable to illness, weather or teacher training!
Wouldn't it be nice if everyone and everything were flexible, schedules included and you could simply drop your work commitments at a moment's notice to substitute care for a sickening child?!
1. If you can – plan. It's true that some of these days are unpredictable, but others may be scheduled ahead of time. Of course nobody knows what the weather is going to do, but snow days only arrive during certain months of the year, whilst inset days are generally planned in advance and with a little bit of work can be sewn into the schedule.
Sick days present the biggest problem of all, of course. You should do a little bit of planning and preparation work in full anticipation that this day will surely come! If you are struggling with your planning, consider some professional coaching to help you get back on track.
2. Save up your personal days. If both parents or adults in the household have regular work commitments, it's important to try and reserve some personal days for the inevitable sick calling. Many employers these days grant a certain amount of personal days and you should talk to your Human Resources department and your line manager as you try to anticipate these scenarios.
You may well not have any advance notice, so you will need to look at this from every angle to make sure that you are being fair to all concerned.
It would definitely be an advantage if you and your partner have a sympathetic employer who could understand your position. Never use these personal/sick standby days for anything other than the reason they were intended.
3. Set up some favours. If you have several children to take care of, you should come up with a backup plan as well. See if you can get some additional emergency care-giving help lined up among good neighbours or friends. Always repay these favours in any way you can. The more emergency backup plans you have the more you are going to be able to cope with the issue of a sick child or three.
4. Roll out the vitamins. When you are coping with sick children, remember that you should pay attention to prevention as it is a lot easier than the cure. Teach your children good personal hygiene, that they should eat well, should rest well and be in good health at all times, as they will be less likely to fall victim to those annoying, smaller viruses.
5. Be a good forecaster. Always keep a watchful eye on the forecasts during the winter months. Weather forecasting has improved much over the years and if they say there is a threat of a blizzard a couple of days ahead, you can be pretty sure and start making contingency plans now. If a school district is closed, it might be very difficult for you to get to your work location as well, but if the office is open, see if you can count on one of those personal days or plan to work from home.
You might think you have to wear so many different hats, that you never know which one to put on.
These days, online life coaching is available to really help you understand this part of your "wardrobe selection!" And thankfully, coaching for women can make all the difference between managing and panicking!
Amanda Alexander, Director of Coaching Mums, helps pressure-cooked, stressed working mums who long for more hours in the day. Through her coaching programmes and online life coaching courses, Amanda shows mums how to create fulfilling and successful lives. For your simple 5 step guide to balance as a working mum, download our free eBook today!
Filed under How To Hypnotize by blogdom










